Despite advice you’ll get from your buddies, women in the dating scene are not looking for the bad guys. That “Alpha Male” persona? Any attraction to a rough exterior can quickly dissolve if a guy doesn’t turn out to be the softer, sweeter partner a woman thinks she’ll find underneath.
“Bad guys” do get girls, but they are definitely not the men that confident women want when it comes to long-term, successful relationships.
“Most women are looking for “the nice guy,”” says Brenda Deere, a Licensed Psychological Associate at Therapy for Women, “When (ladies) are younger, they may think it’s fun to experiment with “the bad guy” notion, but when they are seriously ready to look for a husband, a spouse and a potential father of their children, women really want men who are responsible, honest, loyal and faithful.”
Deere mentions that her clients have a harder time finding the nice guys than the bad ones. So, where have all the good ones gone? If you’re a nice guy, make yourself known! Don’t be fooled into thinking you are not being looked for. The good qualities that “nice guys” possess are what women want when they are choosing permanent partners.
“As much as we want to tout Women’s Lib, I think most women want a protector,” Deere says, explaining why a tough guy may appeal in the beginning, “They want to feel safe and secure.”
So, keep in mind that ladies will enjoy knowing they can count on you physically and emotionally, too. You can be the good hearted type that you are and still find someone who can appreciate it. In fact, there are plenty of women hoping for proof that you exist.
“Don’t despair. Continue to be a genuine man who is gentle and strong at the same time, and you will win in the end.”